just to say..

that i am alive, and that this blog is not dead.
yet.

there's still no phone line at my new place, and no wi-fi to steal.
so the only OCCASIONAL internet services that i get are the ones from back home.
yes
the old place.
LOL!

i don't mind really, and i do kinda miss my old home, but sitting on the floor for a long while just....hurts the ass lah if you get hwat i mean.
and plus it's a lil far to go justttttttttt to get internet.

so oh well.
living without the internet isn't thattttttttttttttttt bad.

on another note, hair dye and highlights tmr! yay!
FINALLY

ooo
and results are finally out for the med year 2s
am surprised!
and happy ^ ^

ok
gotta run
take care ya'll
bye

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

hiatus

aiyoyo
i'll be officially moved in tmr at the new place, and thank god for that!! which means no packing for me anymoreee...but loadsa unpacking -_-

anyhow, dad hasn't applied for a phone line yet, so this means that i won't be online at all for the next..week or so.
drats

i cannot live without the internet yo.

and i'm too busy rite now for real updates
so, see ya'll soon!

of updates and organization

i haven't been blogging regularly, but blame the whole shifting process on that.
a typical day would include me waking up at 12.30 pm or so, lunch, packing and taking my own sweet time, out for dinner with p/catch a movie or so, and back home yakking online/random blog reads/youtube watching until..6.00 am.

yah
my sleeping time is screwed up.

the worst was on last saturday morning where i slept at 6 am, woke up at 9 am and lasted through the whole day til 4 am with no afternoon nap. also, the only reason i woke up at 9 am was because the movers were here and i had to help with the shifting of huge large ass furnitures, such as the dining table, the wooden-solid-teak-wood divider, the settees, the bla bla bla bla..
you get the picture. tiring sial..

although i did manage to hitch a ride on the back of the lorry with the furnitures and the exhaust-filled air, with my dad driving in his car behind the lorry maneuvering the steering wheel with one hand and trying to take a picture with his phone with his other hand.
...
and yes...of course i smiled and posed for the camera :P :P LOL

anyhow, just random photos and updates.

i played baby sitter to justin, whom has been following p and i out for the past few weeks.

this is justin on a day out. -_-" he got bored while p was trying on work-clothes.

had a sorta buffet dinner with p at the saujana hotel (yeah, hyatt saujana has been renamed/refurbished into THE saujana -_-) a few weeks back. we didn't take many photos, HECK we didn't even take a photo of the both of us.
too busy eating, i think.
so we only took seperate photos, and at least 4-5 pictures of the dipped fruits in the chocolate fondue.
-_-
wasted.

makes you drool, ain't it?

the spoon was to scoop MORE MORE chocolate from the chocolate fountain

bad blur picture of me and the chocolate-y delight

MMMmmMMmmm..yummy!!!

although...i suspect that the chocolate had been watered down. -_-
and that they used dark cooking chocolate.
i'm not sure if you can use any other chocolate, but i've tasted a chocolate fondue on another occassion before, and it tasted LOADS better and was milk chocolate, if not mistaken..


i have also found myself a favourite shop in ikano power centre and obviously, it's a food shop.
they sell the PRETTIEST and most colourful jellies ever!!!!! i mean, they taste like normal jellies and all lah..but tell me..when have u EVER seen a jelly THIS pretty?!??!?!!?

we're no ordinary jellies yo

shucks.
i'm a sucker for nice things, no matter how ugly they get at the end. get my drift? LOL

on another note, yes.
i'm still NOT FINISHED packing.
MANNN...i never realized that i had THIS MUCH OF RUBBISH stored in the extra space in my wardrobe!!!!! (yes, i have an extra shelf in my wardrobe for random stuff unrelated to clothing/apparels :P)

i found stacks and stacks of books passed down from my cousin, books which i never knew i had! oh no bother, decided to recycle them since i never knew of their existance or needed them anyway.
also found old notes, old games, 2 boxes of sahibbas, uno stacko, chess, dominoes, mahjong in card form, a 1500-piece puzzle of clarke quay and old exercise books.
HAHAHA
i even found my SPM, SAM and UPSR original papers.

there were also old chinese new year cards (one of which i found RM 14 inside, coz i had used it for a treasury account, NOW explaining why the accounts didn't tally, causing me to fork out my own cash at that time), old letters and souvenirs from friends.

i'm really a pretty sentimental person, which explains why i hold everything dear to me, given or not and purchased or not...but then again, it explains why i've got loadsa things stored here and there and everywhere -_-

so i figured, HECK
if i'm gonna keep this rubbish FOREVER, i'll need more and MORE and MOREE space in time to come.
so why not throw them now??
so out they all went, save for the things, cards and letters from friends of course :P oh and the games too.
just need to pass them down to the young one.

I also stumbled upon my moonflower body shop eau de toilette that i LOVE SO MUCH!
and now that the moonflower line has been discontinued, i love it even more!!! upset. they shouldn't have discontinued the line lah..i think it's the best smelling one throughout the whole store!!

but i think it's quite bodoh lah..coz this is the ONLY 'perfume/fragrance' that i've bought for myself in my entire life, and i can't bear to use it, much less this DISCONTINUED moonflower product.

see? it's still considerably full considering it's been with me for 2 years now

actually, i'm not much a big fan of perfumes or so coz i have a NATURAL BEAUTIFULLY scented body fragrance emitting from the likes of me and it was my pure nothing-better-to-do attitude that made me buy the bottle in the first place. nevermind that i bought it in aussie, meaning that it was THREE TIMES the original price in malaysia.
ya i know, i'm so dumb.

but THEN AGAIN, see?? it's been discontinued! which means it's now worth more than it originally was!! so no regrets yo..

the other eau de toilette that i have is a bottle of DKNY's be delicious, a present from a good friend, which is also almost full -_-. LOL!

DKNY be delicious 100% pure New York

but i love em' bottle shapes yo!!! and i doooo dooo doo appreciate perfumes, although i never buy them..LOL
i like looking at them and wondering how you work them. they can get so complicated wehhh..
and the only reason i never use them is coz when their finished, they'll just be empty has-been bottles of perfume.

adding to which i try my very best to preserve things in their rightful received condition.

even if it means not using them -_-

which also explains why i had boxes of unopened chocolate when i was leaving aussie and some of them had gotten really....weird. lagi teruk, they were chocolates bought from the airport in nice wrapped boxes with ribbons. i couldn't bear to remove the packaging, and so i left it unopened.

the other box of chocolates was from cocoa black, a famous chocolate shop in aussie. it was part of my birthday present hehe, and i received them in july/august.

the cocoa black chocolates were still edible although not as fresh for they were at least 2 months old by the time i decided to open it, and the chocolates from the airport...wellll..lets just say all that i could keep of it were the wrapping and ribbons without having a taste of the chocolate after there was a slight..weird whiff where i learnt that expensive chocolates were meant to be eaten early on, and not....9 months later. -_-

wasted.

anyhow, i have this whole big resolution to be ORGANIZED in the new future room. things will be arranged neatly, no messes or stacks of anything in the room. no clutter and no digging and messing up to look for things. everything will be used and placed back in its original place for future use.

but the problem was, i had too much/many of everything.
in my current room, stationery would always be found at random places. in this drawer in a bag, in the tray on the study table, in transparent tupperwares that are permissible in exams.
some of the pens or mechanical pencils didn't even work and i never knew which was and wasn't!!
havoc lah basically.

so fine.

i came up with a brilliant idea (or brilliant in my eyes lah..)

a toolbox

TA-DAA!!!!!! you can't see but i've got loadsssss of pens/pencils in that blue box but they're being covered by the pilot mechanical pencil. hah. talk about advertising.
and THIS is after i threw half my collection away -_-


i also had the same problem with my makeup, although not much of a hassle, firstly because i didn't have as much makeup as i did stationery, and they weren't as important to me as my stationeries.
so i just chucked them all inside this hand-made box that i did in form 2 for "Kemahiran Hidup". and of course lah, i'm still keeping it! hahahah

the before: my box, my makeup

the after: TA-DAAAAAA!!!!!!!

lip-py stuff arranged vertically on the left
eye-sy stuff, arranged horizontally at the bottom.
eye shadows, mousse, blushers, shimmering powder arranged elsewhere along with hair-ties and clips.

you know, it's really weird, because i BARELY use makeup and yet i have quite a number of it. tak tau lahh..but it does come in useful at times lah. i love choices!! :P
i have 8 eyeliners (out of which there are 6 different colours and one shimmery one, 3 mascaras (one is screwed up though), 3 eye shadow creams, 4 eye shadow in powder form, at least 5 lip glosses, 2 blushers, and... blahhhhhhhhhhh u get the picture.

and to explain barely...barely is about..
once in...two months. -_-

heck, i don't even use foundation every other day unless those dumb horrible ugly red pimples call for it, and even so, i only blob them on the spot instead of rubbing them out evenly all over the face like you're supposed to.

ok i sound bimbotic already. make up, ooo-ahhhss and all that..geee..

hmm...

but then again,
if SAY i WERE a bimbo...

i am NOW....

an ORGANIZED (or so resolved) one.

beat that, HAH! lol

:P

p/s: if you're wondering why some of the pictures (ie the moonflower, the toolbox, ...) were taken on the floor..

well..

it's coz i don't have a table at the moment, which means that i'm lying on my tummy and typing this post out as "i" speak.

hahah

sudah sakit leher dan perut :(

what use is a driver's license..

when i CAN'T DRIVE!!!!!!
not because there's no un-used car at home..
not because i've got NO where to drive to..
not because there's no petrol or whatever lame reason..

but because i LACK the practise!!!!!!!!
i'm too CHICKEN
and i need a smaller car!!!!!!

BABI SIAL!

i only drive on weekends when my dad is able to accompany me.
and even so, i don't drive on all weekends, coz well..outings with the family aren't many since everyone seems busy with something or other.

and apparently i drive 'dangerously'. whatever that means.
ask the parents yo

darn it.
i
MUST
start
DRIVING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm re-housing

during the holidays, my sleeping times are always screwed up. i sleep late and wake up late wayyyyy into the afternoon. and i'm usually not like this because on every other normal day, i'd be awake by 7 am and rushing to get ready for uni. even with the short breaks in between i'd get up no later than 11 am because i'm more adapted to my uni-life schedule.
so there's only one reason for this.

the holidays.

so i shall say 'BECAUSE' of the holidays, my sleeping times are screwed up, instead of 'during' the holidays.

Rephrase

BECAUSE of the holidays, my sleeping times are screwed up. i sleep late and wake up late, wayyyyyyyyy into the afternoon.

BECAUSE of the holidays, i'm bored out of my wits but am darn too lazy to get my arse working.
Although i DID make some feeble, half-hearted attempts at working by asking my dad to find me a job in his company. a number of times.

BECAUSE of the holidays, i'm forced to behave like a motherly sister as i prepare lunch each day and look over the young one.

BECAUSE of the holidays, i sit at home and rot while i force myself to pack my whole life of 8 years in the current room into small tiny boxes big enough to fit ..well..a few things :P

but then again..

BECAUSE of the holidays, i am able to go out and lepak my whole life away and watch all those movies out there with p. i think i've watched most of the english shows available.
stardust, enchanted, bee movie, beowulf, the kingdom, lions for lambs, across the universe and i dunno what else

BECAUSE of the holidays, i am able to meet ppl not from uni, and of course my old time friends. Although i haven't really got down to re-arranging those meetings, but i will! soon enough!

BECAUSE of the holidays, i am NOT stressed up and i am NOT worried about any clashing deadlines, overload of work, exams, or overly particular lecturers.

so i think i DO prefer the holidays over anything else, even though it makes me bored out of my wits.
oh welll

the latest update in my life?

haha
i'm re-housing *points to post-title*

i'm re-housing, because i'm re-watching house season 4. i don't know if it's just me, but i get amazed even watching the episodes the 2nd time round!!
i loveeeeee episodes 3 and 5!!!! i think i've watched those 2 episodes bout 3-4 times now.
hahah!

not only so, but i'm re-watching desperate HOUSEwives too.
season 4.
i've come to adore orson, bree's husband!!! coz he's such the lovable, understanding husband, but also damn kiddy and small child at the same time lorrrrr
how adorable is that?!??!??

i'm also re-housing, in terms of shifting to another house, hence the whole shit loads of complaints about packing on msn, facebook, and on this blog too.
haha *grins stupidly*
i think i complain too much sometimes.
but really, I HATE PACKING

if you notice, when ppl pack their stuff up, their surrounding area becomes NEATER.
mine?
they become MESSIER.
loads MESSIER.
sigh

anyhow, my new room in the new house has been painted with 3 colours and fitted with 2 lightings
one side is painted pink (yes...i CHOSE pink. don't ask why.. -_-)
the other is painted blue
and the other other side is painted barley white.

ok now.
the trouble is, i selected the pink paint, and apparently what you get on pamphlets isn't the same as what you get on the walls.
hence the pink is very much unnoticable in broad day light.

the blue shade was chosen by my dad.
and welll...
lets just say my dad wants a half-past-six-shade-of-blue, meaning he wants the blue, but isn't very sure if blue is the right colour. so what he did was to select the lightest shade of blue available in the pamphlet.
so TECHNICALLY, the blue turned out.....whitish blue. it's not even blue-ish white. it's white-ish blue., simply to say..it's more WHITE than blue.
-_-

the barley white..aiya biasalah.
it's my dad's "play safe" colour.
my current condo now is painted all over with that shade of paint.
except my room that is.
i painted it blue.

so if in brighttt day light, my whole room looks barley-whitish-white

but come night, you see a slight tinge of pink.

nvm the blue. it's unnoticable with whatever colour lights you put. unless you go really nearrrrrrrrrrrr to the wall and observe.

and also, i tried being, uhhh.. creative? if creative is the right word.

i decided to have my room fitted with 2 lights - orangy and white, so that i can turn on whichever one to suit the mood.

orange - when i wanna relax, or chilllingggg, or impresss, or whatever lahh

white - when nerd mode is on and i wanna read..or..do whatever nerdy.

but considering i'll only be living in that house for about 2 months before i get shipped off to johor and BECAUSE it is the holidays (SEE?!??!BECAUSE is a better word to describe the holidays!) i'll only be using the orange light.
and considering i'll only be back in the house during some weekends and long breaks, on which both occassions there will be no studying or nerding, the white lights are redundant.

but oh wellll
just IN CASE lah you know

just IN CASE

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
back to packing.

Across the Universe

kill me all ye want you beatle fans, but i think this movie is a waste of time.

save your money and buy a dvd.

better yet, buy the audio cd.

there's was no point in the video/movie anyway

bahhhhhhh

*edit*

ok

i just re-read the post before this, and i realized that i had forgotten to add...

that IF the person passes on..it is ENTIRELY due to chance.

not because i cursed them to death..

but because it just SO HAPPENED.

coincidence yo.

besides...
i'm not that mean to wish a person dead.
i'd never wish a person dead.

kk

nuff said

The reason

when you have an argument or sorts with someone, do you say sorry?
are you the first to apologize?
do you feel bad?
and why did you apologize in the first place? was it your fault? or did you just want to make things better?

i was just randomly thinking and wondering, and then i realized that if ever i argued with anyone or whoever for that matter, and if i was a big enough person to apologize first..
there're only two things that would usually make me say sorry

1) the fault was mine

2) thoughts of the person dying soon after -_-

it may sound dumb, but it is entirely true!! and of course a lil berzerk but blame the vivid imaginations that i have k? too many a time have we argued with little thought about the consequences. i'm not pinpointing at anyone here, but they're just random thoughts that i always have. so you don't have to screw your mind just to think and make out who it is i'm talking about, aight :P

so anyhow, for example, sayyy....

after arguing with say, mr x or whatever, i'd always be so pissedddddd off at first that i'd think of so many ways to make that person even angrier.
then a few moments after, my mind would proceed to start playing the 'what if ' card.

for example, if the foresaid person told me that he/she was going to go on a trip, or to a shopping mall, or to a friend's house later on in the day, i would always feel tremendously bad when i realize (or imagine) if someway somehow, they DID perish doing whatever small thing it is that they had planned on doing

it can be due to the plane crashing
it can be due to a road accident
can be due to..i dunno..whatever freak ass weirdos out there commiting crimes

but the thing is,
i HATE the idea of letting someone pass away in bad memory when if fact i could have done all i could and be the bigger person to make things better in the first place. (i mean, who doesn't?)
you know how they say cliched things like, 'appreciate every moment of the day', and 'you never know but this could be the last time you're seeing someone'?
yeah.
it IS exactly that.

of course it's due to my over-valued imagination sometimes that he/she is gonna pass away just after we've had an argument. but the question is, WHAT IF?

what if you argued with someone over something you feel so strongly for? and that the next moment, who knows, but WHAT IF they DID just suddenly die?
what if you were given a chance to say your last words to them? (confirm it would then be a word of apology)
what if the argument was over something so trivial and there was no other chance to express just how sorry you are?

you'd never be able to live your life in solace.
worse still, you'd crumble and rot with the though that you hadn't tried to make things better between your friend and you, and that you had let them down by letting them die without clearing the air of anger and doubt between the both of you.

it is really quite horrible when you think about it.

and when the person then passes away, you'd be soooooooooo filled with regret, you'd wish for a second chance.

a second chance to say i'm sorry.
and if possible, a chance to show your appreciation of them and basically whatever it is in your capability that would make them comfortable and happy before they pass on.

but that's the thing.

we don't realize this until AFTER someone leaves us forever.

which would then make it too late.

yes, it's cliche and all that, but no one ever said cliches weren't true.

so you may think of me as some freak, but yeahh..
it IS one of the reasons i apologize..
and i think it's HECK OF A GOOD REASON YO!!! although a lil screwed up in a funny little way

but i suppose the main thing to realize is that every moment spent together should be treasured, for we don't all have the same amount of moments.

some have more, some less.
some live longer, some don't

therefore, the only way that we can equal out both life spans is by having as much meaning as we can in whatever given moments that we have.

and apologizing is a start to new meanings in life

the time my dad IMPLIED that i wasn't ugly..

i came home late last night after we had crashed a house of a friend's friend only to find my dad asleep on the couch with the tv turned on (to some boring ass channel) with the remote control on his chest.
LOL
no big surprise there. really.

so since it was, uh, a LIL late, i crept quietly into my room, locked my room door and passed a glance at the mirror and was suddenly hit by a flashback.
then i couldn't stop laughing.

hahah
you know how parents are really toooooo overprotective at times?
yeah well, so a coupla years back, my parents had a rule of having NOOOOOOO boyfriends til after i graduate from uni.
that's just ancient man!

so being the SLIGHTLY (and note, i said SLIGHTLY) rebellious child that i am, i totally ignored that houserule and had myself a boyfriend.
of course i told them about it coz i'm really bad at keeping things from my parents. besides, they'd find out in due time anyway so must as well let it out in the open first. it's also loads easier to go out and stuff like that without having to think too much.

but i used to think differently many years back. I thought that it was normal for every teen to have secrets from their parents and that if you really believed in them, then it was alright for you to keep them quiet. i firmly believed (at that point of time) that if i EVER EVER EVER had a boyfriend, i'd keep mums about it. shush. zilch. silence. zipped. whatever, to the extent where i even had a backup plan months/years before i even considered a relationship!!! yes, i know it sounds a lil-over-the-top and so-full-of-myself but c'mon.

don't tell me that you've NEVER considered a relationship?

where you'd always have someone by your side and someone to talk to and fall back on?
and don't tell me that's what best friends are for, coz husbands/wives have the same/main purpose (other than to continue producing offsprings). otherwise you die a spinster/bachelor only lohhhhh

so yeah.
i suppose different people consider relationships at different stages of life, and mine happened to be pretty late in the years.
anyhow, back to the plan.
it was this whole strategy where i'd make it obvious that i was lying about having a boyfriend and that when the time actually came when i DID have a boyfriend.....
well..
then it wouldn't be much of my fault would it?
i mean, i told you about it (although in a rather peculiar weird ass way) but if it so happens that you choose not to believe me (which is part of the strategy) then it isn't completely my fault now, is it?

LOL
so when i was much much younger, i used to just laugh and blurt out that i did actually have a boyfriend (when i didn't) to either my mom, dad or brother.

to which my mom would just laugh and say "aiyarrrr..so short, flat nose, small eyes, got ppl wan merhhh???"
then we'd all laugh, including me.
heh.
plan working out FIIINNNNEEEEEE

then the day came when i DID actually have a boyfriend and i decided that mums isn't the way to go.
so i sat my mom down, and she knew i wasn't lying anymore.
she wasn't too happy about it, but oh well..little girl has grown up already.
but to daddy, little girl will always be little girl.

hahaha
so it sounded pretty sweet one day, when i was in the car whilst he was driving me somewhere.
i think it was pretty awkward for him, but he started off the conversation of relationships and how i was too young for it ( i was 17)

and he said

"why do you want a relationship now? it'll do you more harm than good.
cannot study, cannot focus, waste money, waste time. after kena cheated also
how?
wait awhile longer lah. so many guys out there. and not like you're ugly
also. you're not bad looking what."

hahaha

so there we have it.
i'm not ugly, and not bad looking....

according to the dad, that is ;P